The Rationale Behind Imma's Extravagant Birthday Party

I invited every single kindergartner to Imma's birthday party.
I invited a lot of our family friends, new friends from school, teachers and administrators who work with her. I invited a lot of people.  If I didn't invite you and you'd like to come, message me and we'll make it happen. I have been working on invitations and decorations for over a month and I will be working on them until the very last minute.
I have booked a petting zoo, a bounce house, and Alice will be here (It's an Alice in Wonderland party.)
I have bought new apothecary jars for the Candy Bar.
So far, the reaction from parents has been something along the lines of, "Did you make these invitations??" Yes. Yes, I did.  "I can't believe you wrote their names in calligraphy!"  Yes, yes I did.
The reaction from the kids I have talked to is, "I'm going to Imma's birthday party!!" I've heard from parents that it's been more of a demand than a request.
The reaction from my very close friends and family members has been a little more like, "Are you insane??" and I guess they have a point. So let me attempt to explain my thinking.
Earlier in the year, I often heard other students talking about Imma, and not in a good way.  She has been called "mean," "weird," "different," "trouble-maker," and those are just the things I have heard. While I will admit she is different, she is none of those other things.  As the year has progressed, a lot of that has changed, though I do still hear other children make comments like, "She doesn't talk to anyone," or "She only swings at recess and she won't play with us." That's better, but it's not good enough.
Imma has recently started reaching out to other children besides her friends in her class. She has three or four friends in her class that she adores and they adore her, too. I refer to one little girl as her best friend because I know, if Imma could express such an abstract concept, that's what she would say, though I'm not sure the other girl would say Imma is her best friend. I know she would definitely say she is her friend though.  She is constantly looking out for Imma, as are two or three other children in her class, and I love that. I want other children to have the opportunity to get to know Imma the way that these children have. Now that she is reaching out to some of these other children, I wanted to give them the opportunity to come and play with her, too.
But it goes beyond that. I want Imma to be in a situation where she can feel completely comfortable (at her home) doing something that she loves (bounce houses and petting animals!) where she will have the opportunity to share this with other children.  We live in a small town.  These kids will be with each other for the next 12 years. Most of them will go all the way through high school together. I want her to always be in a situation where she has a friend. I don't know who will be in her class next year but if she knows most of the kids in her grade, then, hopefully, she will always feel like there is someone nearby who can help her if she needs help.
I also want to know the other parents. I want them to know us, to see what we are about, to make them feel comfortable enough to ask the questions they need to ask or find out from talking to us what is going on with Imma so that they don't make assumptions. I know from watching the other parents and coaches at softball that some people want to know what the nature of her disability is but they haven't asked. As I have gotten to know some of the other parents better, we've talked about it and that has been helpful.  I want to know that the other parents will be supportive of her and help her out when she needs it, particularly in situations when I'm not there or I can't help her.  We had a mighty village in McKinney but our village here is not as strong yet so I am  continuing to strengthen those connections and I hope to create new ones.
I also have a hard time letting go of all of our friends from our old life. I want to share these special occasions with all of the people that we have always shared them with. So of course I invited them as well.
I also know that, whenever we have a party, usually less than a quarter of the people we invite are able to make it.  This party happens to be the day before Mother's Day so it's very likely that some people won't be able to come. I don't expect 150 people to show up.  If they do, that will be great, but I think we may have 25 kids--and hopefully there parents will stay. I can live with that.
As for the insane amount of decorations I am hand making, well, that's just my budding Martha Stewart.  I know I didn't have to hand make her invitations, address them in calligraphy  spend 10 hours making various photo props today, etc. But it sure was fun!
So, that's my explanation--take it or leave it.  At the end of the day, as long as Imma has fun, it'll be worth all of the time, trouble, and goat poo!

All day today, she kept saying, "make Alice, make Alice!"

Another Imma Surprise

I should know by now, when Imma does something that looks unusual, I'm probably missing something. She left a row of magnetic tiles on my board yesterday after school. It was there all day so I noticed the gaps. I didn't notice anything else. After school today, she started to sing a little alphabet song. "A is for ant," etc. I hadn't heard this one before. It didn't rhyme and some of the words were unusual. Then I realized what she had done. Some people may not think my child is brilliant like I do but you can't tell me she doesn't think differently than most children. She never ceases to amaze me.

Cramming in As Much As We Can!

We have been so busy the last few weeks with softball that we haven't had a lot of time for anything else.  I have been so busy working on Imma's birthday invitations and decorations writing a blog post just doesn't ft on the "to-do" list most days.  Here are a few highlights from the last few weeks!
Brian's parents visited this weekend.  The girls had a lot of fun playing with their grandparents.  Grandpa went to Imma's double-header on Saturday and watched her hit the game-winning single!
Oh ya, Imma had a double-header on Saturday!  In the first game, she batted twice and got two hits. She was the only girl to hit a pitch and get on base (there were some foul balls).  The second hit came off of the tee. We were playing an older select team and basically got smoked.  In the second game, we played a team we had already played once and we beat them 11-12.  Imma still isn't paying too much attention in the field but the girl can hit the ball.  And she actually ran to first this time, too!
Did I mention I have been working on Imma's birthday party? Holy cow, do I ever over-do it on these things!  I just passed out about 120 invitations to kindergartners.  Well, to their teachers. I walked into kindergarten lunch and thought, "I just invited these people too my house--all of them--at the same time?!?" She seriously has a pretty good class though. I am hoping she gets at least 20 friends over. After all, the party is the day before Mother's Day and we statistically get much fewer friends than we invite.  I am preparing for 100 but hoping for 20 and guessing maybe 15.
I've been making a lot of tutus and rhinestone t-shirts. Not only have I had quite a few sales lately, I also decided to donate a few of the Autism Awareness tutus to a Facebook page that was looking to raise awareness. Crafting keeps me plenty busy!
Lucy is getting ready for her dance recital in May.  She is a dancing queen!  She keeps telling me, "Look, Monney, I a princess!"  Yes you are, girlfriend!  Still no interest in potty-training, still won't get rid of that stinkin' bottle (I know I will have to get rid of it for her but if you had only been there when Imma gave up hers, you would understand why no one should ever have to go through that again. Ever.)
We are planning a vacation!  Not sure where we are going yet or when but we are considering Amelia Island, Florida, or South Padre.
The girls are going to be taking swimming lessons this summer so I got them signed up for that.  One of the teachers here has been giving swimming lessons for a very long time and she already knows Imma very well so we are hoping she will be successful at teaching our girls how not to drown!
End of year at school means lots of extra things for me and lots of testing for Imma.  I am hopeful that she will finally show she can rhyme so she can beat that pesky TPRI test.  It would also be nice if she would read as well at school as she does at home but for some reason many children just don't seem to do that. And then there's the dreaded TEMI math test that I must administer to her. I am so looking forward to that again--NOT!
That pretty much sums up what we've been up to over here! Hopefully, I will get back to posting fairly regularly once school is over!

More softball!

Imma had her first game Saturday. She got a hit, scored an RBI, and fielded the ball. We were very proud of her. Sunday was the official Opening Day Ceremony. Here are pics from each.

A Little Life Back In Independent Mommy

As my girls grow older, they play together more.  They also fight and argue more but from time to time, I notice I get about a ten minute stretch  when I can actually finish a task without being interrupted or having to stop to go see whose fort is being attacked or who said someone else was a poo-poo-head.  As much as I love my cute little girls, it's nice that they are getting older and can manage being left for a few minutes without my eyes directly on them.
We have a toy room upstairs near our movie room.  The girls will go up and play in the toy room most afternoons and I"ll either stay with them or go try to get something done elsewhere on the top floor. Going downstairs is usually a waste of time because I just find myself sprinting back and forth breaking up fights or a meandering Lucy will come and find me.  Yesterday, I had the great idea of trying to catch up on one of the shows I had on the DVR while the girls were playing. So I went into the movie room and started watching it.  I got rather engrossed and then suddenly realized I hadn't heard a word from either of my children in a while.  I had lost track of time so I didn't know if it had  been two minutes or twenty.  I went running into the toy room to see if they were okay and they were sitting on the couch watching a cartoon, perfectly still  and content.  I was shocked. That never happens!  And of course it ended because I had entered the room and suddenly everyone needed something.  If only I had been a little more stealthy. . . .
But it got me thinking of all the possibilities having older children brings!  It hadn't even crossed my mind that someday I might actually be able to go do whatever I want for more than thirty minutes, while both of my children are awake and in the same house. It's an amazing idea, almost too wonderful to be true!
Brian and I have watched a lot of Seinfeld over the years and we really like an episode where George gets angry that his girlfriend Susan is becoming friends with Elaine.  He says she is, "killing Independent George."  One day, out of frustration, I told him that Imma was, "killing Independent Mommy."  It's kind of become a joke in our house over the years. I am looking forward to reviving Independent Mommy and the idea that my children might actually learn to play well together--or separately for that matter--is quite appealing!
If you have older children, what age were they when they became more independent? If you have smaller children, how do you manage to supervise their play and still get everything done you have to do?

This is one of my favorite pictures of my girls playing together.  

Imma Got Her Hair Cut by Someone Other than Herself!

Last weekend was full of excitement and I haven't had a chance to post about this until now.  We decided that Imma needed her hair trimmed on Saturday so we decided to take her to the place where we used to get her bangs trimmed when she was little.  It's in the town we used to live in, which is about 30 minutes away, but we needed to go over there for something else anyway so we stopped by Groovy's as well.  The reason we like this place is because they have movies and games for the kids to keep them entertained while they are getting their hair done.  There's also some cute little cars for the little ones to sit in  but Imma was too big for those now.
I thought for sure we'd have a huge meltdown or she'd run out the door.  But she did so well!  The hairstylist kept asking her questions.  She'd answer the "yes" or "no" questions but nothing else, probably because she didn't know what she was asking her.  But the woman just said, "Is she always this shy?" instead of the typical, "What's wrong with her?" type of questions we usually get.
I was shocked that Imma let her wash her hair. I didn't think she'd like being tipped back like that.  But she sat perfectly still.  Then, she looked straight ahead as she got the trim, only flinching a few times when a stray hair tickled her nose.  Finally--she let the stylist blow dry her hair!  I  couldn't believe it!  She let someone hold a loud hot thing next to her head!  Unbelievable!  She did so awesome, I was super proud of her!

Imma getting her hair washed

Getting ready for the trim

Sorry this one is so dark.  

She just stared straight at that TV!

And a brownie for a reward!

Rapunzel Lucy probably needed a trim, too, but I wasn't ready for that yet.  She still hasn't had a haircut at 2 1/2 so I know she needs to have those ends trimmed. I just need some more time, sniffle sniffle. She did have fun running around the salon though.

Lucy probably needed a trim too but I was not ready for that yet!

How do your special needs kiddos--or typical children for that matter--react to haircuts?

Autism Awareness Day

Today feels much different than Autism Awareness Day has the last two or three years.  Last year, I celebrated Autism Awareness Day as the parent of an "autistic" child. Today, I celebrate as the parent of a special needs child, but not an autistic one.  This doesn't make the cause any less near and dear to my heart, but it changes my perspective.  And I am thankful for this change of view.
You cannot be told that your child has autism, live that life for two years, and not be changed.  It's kind of like taking a journey, having your car break down, spending a lot of time in a town you never intended to stay in, and then continuing on.  No matter how long you spend in your ultimate destination, you'll always have the memories from your unintended visit.  And that's how I feel about autism.
Today isn't just about spreading awareness of an enigmatic disability, it's not just about celebrating some of the most amazing people I've ever had the fortune to know, it's not just about lifting a torch of hope that someday all parents will be on the other side of autism, it's about being thankful.  As much as I can respect the idea that taking autism away from a child would change who they are, I've never been a proponent of proclaiming I'm happy my child has these differences because that's what makes her special.  I'm not happy that my child struggles to communicate, can't process simple language, still doesn't know which pronoun to use, hates fireworks because they are too loud, only drinks water, and can't stand to see colored tiles unsorted and stacked.  I want her to continue to overcome the obstacles that have prevented the world from knowing all of the amazing thoughts she has trapped in her perfect little mind.  Though our struggles are far from over, I am thankful today that I can no longer consider myself the parent of a child with autism.  Hopefully someday, either through a cure, life-changing therapy, or situations similar to ours where autism turned out to be something else, many, many more parents will find themselves on this side of the spectrum as well.

Imma last fall, after we found out she was not autistic

One year when I was teaching kindergarten, I had an amazing five year old in my class.  I was told he had autism and I was given several strategies to use to help him learn.  This child was extremely intelligent and had many gifts.  For example, one day he walked in to my class, picked up a book and started reading it.  Just out of the blue, overnight, he had suddenly synthesized all of the information I had taught him thus far and started reading. Amazing.  He had aversions to loud noises, repetitive speech, language processing difficulties, and a strong need for a routine. At the end of the year, I was told he was being dismissed from special education because he wasn't autistic after all.  I was shocked.  He had so many characteristics that we usually associate with people on the autism spectrum. I'm not sure exactly what they determined was an appropriate diagnosis for my little friend but this was the first time I was faced with a misdiagnosis of autism. Thankfully for my family, it wasn't the last time.  When I was told that Imma's evaluation showed she was not on the spectrum, I remembered this other child and I wondered if the feelings of relief I was experiencing had been the same for his mother.
The most important statement I could make to the parents of a special needs child is, "Don't ever give up hope."  Keep hoping for breakthroughs, advancements, cures, more research, more funding.  You just never know where hope can take you.  The surefire way to stop your child's progress is to give up.  The second we stop believing that our child will one day have a normal life is the day that dream dies. So never stop believing.
Imma is in the middle of another language explosion right now and it always makes me excited and reflective when this happens.  She continues to make tremendous progress and I am so thankful for all of the people who work so hard for her.  But most importantly, I am so happy that I was the one chosen to be her mother.  She is an amazing blessing and she continues to teach me something new every single day.  Today is a day to celebrate how far we've come and to look forward to a future where no one's label reads, "autistic."

Easter Egg-stravaganza!

We didn't let a little rain get us down! We colored Easter eggs Saturday night and then had an in-door Easter egg hunt Sunday morning.

Getting ready to start!

Everything is in place!

Let me at those eggs!

Our beautiful creations.

Now to add the stickers!

Lucy was not so good at adding stickers.  A few eggs were harmed in the making of this picture.

Easter morning!

Imma loves candy!

She couldn't wait to open each egg.

She was not as thrilled about wearing this.

Back to the candy.

Lucy was very excited!

She didn't mind the bunny ears.

She got a Sponge Bob book, which she loves.

They were just a blur looking for the eggs!

Plenty of toys to dig through to find the eggs.

Found another one!

And one on the piano!

We had a wonderful Easter.  God has truly blessed us in so many ways. We were so lucky to be able to celebrate that He is Risen with our beautiful girls.

How did you spend your Easter?